… and I’m super annoyed! Here’s the email I received:

Hi.  So…I can’t believe I’m doing this because it’s really hard and there are a hundred reasons I can think of not to, but I wanted to drop you a line.  I’m not writing to try to get back into your life or anything, and I’m not trying to bum you out.  It’s just that the way things went between us, I am realizing, is a big point of guilt for me, and I wanted to get some things off my chest so I can feel better, and maybe so you could feel a little better, too.  I wanted you to know that I’m really sorry, and I hope that you can forgive me.  I hope you’re happier than ever and that life is going great for you.  You’re a tremendous person and you deserve nothing but happiness, and I hope that you’ll remember that you deserve to be treated like a queen and nothing less by anyone in your life.  I guess that’s the most important thing for me, and that’s why I’m writing, really.  I just hope that our relationship made you expect more from the guys in your life, not less.

Anyway…no need to respond or anything.  I hope that if we ever meet again things can be cool between us.  Please forgive me for being awful.  I didn’t even know what I had, I think.

Blah—you must be ready to puke reading this!   : )  Take care, Jules. 

-Aaron 

P.S. Seriously, though, you’re an amazing woman and don’t you ever forget it!

I feel like this is a really half assed apology considering what a huge flaming douche bag this mother fucker is. He was physically, verbally, emotionally, and sexually abusive. He systematically isolated me from my friends and family. He would try and talk me into moving into a place out of my price range so I would be financially dependent on him, and made ultimatums about me quitting my job when I started to make friends with my coworkers. He screamed at me for hours, day after day, until I felt like I was going to break. He used sex as a way to obtain dominance and control; using it to degrade me. He would get physical enough to use it as a fear tactic. He made me feel physically and emotionally unsafe. There were many times when I thought of suicide as my only escape. He’d try to convince me that I was crazy and over dramatic, and that he was doing me a favor by lying to me to get me to come home early and restraining me so I couldn’t leave the apartment.

And then he has the balls to write that I’m an “amazing woman.” I don’t need your fucking approval, your opinion means shit to me. Yes, I am all that and a bag of chips, but you will never understand the extent of which you are missing out. St Patty’s day is my one year anniversary from leaving that fucker, and without a doubt I can say it is the best decision I have ever made.

p.s. Considering what a pretentious snob you were about bachelors in English and how you’re such a fantastic writer, I find it hilarious how shittily composed this email was.