Posts tagged: strong women
Give me some props :)
The way women ‘fight’ SUCKS.
Did your boyfriend cheat on you? If he did, and you’re more upset that the women he slept with, than him, then you have fallen victim to maladaptive socialization. Letting the man off the hook, staying together with him, and blaming the ‘home wrecking whore’ for the cheating is bullshit! If you decide to say with him, forgive him, work past it.. etc that’s your choice, BUT I think it’s important to recognize that it was a decision HE made to cheat, HE fucked up, and even if the other woman threw herself at him in a less that commendable fashion HE is the one ultimately responsible for the infidelity. Not doing so is perpetuating the mind set that men have no self control; the same mindset of it being 100% the girls job to “say no.” I personally think that men are capable of more than we give them credit for, I think they can think with their heads and not their cocks, and that if we set our expectations as such we will find some men will live up to it.
Another example of unhealthy conflict resolution women frequently take part in is the covert attack. If another woman has an issue with you, doesn’t like something you’ve done, feels that you’ve wronged them… etc, it is very rare that they will come right out and say it. Instead, they will talk to all of your mutual friends and trash talk you. Not only the specific issue they take objection with, but the way you dress, your haircut, and overall physical appearance. They will misinterpret things you’ve said and use it against you. The woman will continue to do this until your mutual friends have joined in talking trash about you until they feel they’ve ‘won’; that everyone agrees with them, that you are in fact, a cold hearted trashy slutbag. This may escalate to an open admission of disliking you (maybe one of the mutual friends told you what they said, but the open admission will probably be text or a facebook message, rarely face to face). The mutual friends will then be forced to take sides. Does this seem like some manipulative backwards BS to you?
Who’s responsible for this?!
….The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.
But they are not the only culprit! Soap Operas, The Hills, 90210, The Heathers, Mean Girls, 10 Things I Hate about You, and pretty much all other movies and TV shows marketed specifically for a female audiences.
Stop internalizing the media’s trash! Let’s have a face to face sit down, utilize “I”-statements, and realize that you’ve probably done some insensitive-drama causing-shit yourself, and cut a girl a break. Not every conflict is going to have the same solution, but MAKE SURE YOU’RE ACTUALLY WORKING TOWARDS A SOLUTION, not ‘winning the fight.’